very long nv online liao.. stupid internet gt prob.. modem spoil.. yuppx.. so sry for not posting for so long le and nv reply the tags.. even though now ok le.. can use the internet le.. but horx.. haiz.. it is very very very very lag.. super slow can.. i took ard 1/2 hr to come to these page lorx.. wad the.. den msn izzit gt prob? or my internet gt prob? i very pissed now leh~!!! msn keeps signing in and out.. i wan to use the internet also so slow.. i need to do my thing de lorx! ARGH!!! =@


yesterday gt sports heats.. yeah.. din wanted to run de.. but..run in the end.. coz fiona let mi run.. hm.. haiya.. i dunno how to say leh.. but feel quite bad.. suppose to be she run de.. but end up mi running.. and i din run very fast too.. slower than last yr.. =X it went like this.. coz huiling run 1500m le den very tired.. so asked mi to sub her.. i din wan at first.. coz i scared.. den c.h. sub her.. =) but horx.. den fiona ask mi run.. den i dunno.. den i agree.. den huiling say she ok le.. den sub c.h. .. den i wanted to let fiona run but she ask mi to.. so i run lorx.. but feel quite bad.. i ran 4 x 100m.. the first runner.. so jin zhang.. sad.. i slow down at the back.. haiz.. lol.. nvm.. they are going to scold mi for saying these.. =X after running almost muscles cramp lorx.. dunno why it is not leg de but hand one.. haha.. maybe i use too much strength on my hand on holding the baton liao.. hahaa.. well..we gt 4th for our heats.. hope tt we can get a chance to get in bah.. coz we very pathetic lah.. din take part in many events and din gt in for ani too.. sad.. anyway, i think sports day is useless for us.. competing with the sports players.. lol.. it is rubbish can.. very difficult for us to win de lorx.. nvm.. forget it..

we went to cha yuan today in the morning.. haha.. it was so nice.. i think tt that place is cosy.. esp when the 10 of us were lyk sitted in a room together and tok.. hahaa.. and we drank the tea and eat tea egg and zhong zi.. i think chinese tea is nice.. healthy too.. =) shld drink more often.. haha.. i hope time would have stood still den.. i dun wish to go back to sch.. how i wish we could have just sat there and drink tea and tok and tok.. i dun wan to face the fact.. i dun wan to come back sch to noe my sucky results.. i really dun.. owell.. but it is all over now.. our class noe all the results le.. we were in the com lab just now during emaths and den ms zarinah came in with our SS paper.. haiz.. my scipt was one of the last few.. i sat there waiting for my paper nervously.. i really thought i would fail.. really scared.. luckily i din.. but.. haiz.. most of the ppl in the class did well too.. oh.. i noe i shld not compare.. i dun have the qualities to do tt.. i dun have.. and i shld not.. but i just can't help it.. lol..


recently, many ppl are upset over their results.. well.. i am too.. i really very disappointed in some of my results.. i just wan to say thanks to everyone for consoling mi.. i wish i could help some of them too.. i see tt some of them are really upset n depressed over their results.. i really really wish i can cheer them up.. but i dunno how to.. i feel so helpless.. i dun wan them to be so upset too.. i hope they are happy.. they cried today.. i just wan to help them.. but i dunno how.. tell mi.. wad shld i do??? really feel upset seeing them lyk tt too.. esp when they seems ok and appear cheerful on the outside.. i am worried for them.. i scared tt they will breakdown too.. i dunno how they are feeling on the inside... i wan to help! pls.. let mi.. i just really hope tt they will be alright.. i noe tt they are facing a lot of family problems at home too.. but.. like the saying goes: jia jia you ben nan nian de jing.. haiz.. i wonder wad i can do for them.. hope tt this will be over soon.. and everyone can be back to normal and be happy agn.. lyk the times when we have fun together and crap and tok together.. but now.. we are all so quiet and tok abt nthing but results results and results.. but can't help it.. we have to.. tts the way abt students.. our burden is studying.. and family dun noe.. they think studying is easy.. haiz.. i dun noe how to encourage them.. seeing them lyk tt makes mi feel pain too.. i dunno why.. but this is the first time i am feeling so strongly.. the first time.. maybe they make mi feel gd when i am with them too.. they cared for mi.. they are concern for mi when i am down n lonely.. so i wan to care for them in the same way too.. haiz.. but i really dunno how.. i feel so useless tt i can't help anything..

i am bad too.. i also can't help it but seems very ap and sad smtimes.. forgive mi.. i will be stronger.. but i am greedy.. i still hope tt those ard mi will be happy and cheerful but not upset.. this will help mi feel better too..


stayed back after sch and slack and tok.. den have dinner.. but there were only 5 of us.. it is getting lesser and lesser.. y have it become lyk tt? i dun lyk it.. i dun lyk the quietness tt we have.. i preferred the noisy us who makes a lot of trouble for the uncles at 85.. when we tok and crap together.. we tok abt everything under the sun.. and can link from something to something.. hahaa.. never ending.. when can we return to these times? happy and memorable time.. i wish it would come quickly..


tml no sch.. going to have a very "nan guo" weekend agn.. haiz.. i dunno why since last week i have been missing asg a lot.. hoping tt chalet wld come quickly.. maybe becoz i am stuck at home where no one toks to mi or listen to wad i wan to say.. so i wan to go out.. alone and lonely.. lol.. nvm..



sry ppl.. i have been very ap these few days and weeks.. sry if i aped u.. really very sorry.. esp to a few ppl.. i may have seem pissed too.. but not at anyone but myself.. ya.. thx for all the concern.. =) i am alright de..



ppl are feeling sad n depressed.. so am i.. over results and family and stuffs.. i dunno wads wrong with mi.. cross the road carelessly twice today.. on purpose or not i dunno.. maybe i really did it on purpose.. well.. but i dun have the courage.. no worries den.. haha.. =)

haiz.. got back quite a few papers le.. well.. most of them.. none of them is great.. the only thing tt i am happy abt is tt i passed my physics.. i think tt is the only thing i am proud of bah.. but the rest of the papers just sucks! no As no science.. hunamities is juat soooooooo horrible.. although haven gt back SS yet.. but i noe tt.. just hope tt i will pass my SS bah.. which i dun have a single hope.. =( mr tan said tt it was my expectation tt is too high.. but i dun think so.. mr mok said this to mi too.. but no lorx.. just look at the rest of the ppl in the class or even worst other classes.. sorry.. i din meant anything.. but ya.. haiz.. i am really very disappointed with my results.. i really studied hard for some subjects.. but i still din do well.. and it is even worse.. so.. i have make up my mind tt i shld not study so hard.. the results will still be ard the same.. so wad for? studying so hard for such sucky results? NO.. i am not.. ='( i really feel lyk crying sometimes.. really.. these results just.. i gt nothing to say.. why??? i dun understand.. it is just all my fault.. owell.. haiz..


i just hate myself a lot! sometimes a really hope i can just die.. why is living so difficult? i just dun wan to face the reality.. i dun wan to.. i think i will breakdown soon.. real soon.. maybe i am not just as strong as i think.. or wad others think.. wads wrong with mi? thinking of crying a lot these few days.. maybe it is just becoz of results.. ='( but i just dun have the courage to do wad i think.. so dun worry.. i just hope i have.. ='(

today is mother's day! wish all the mothers' a happy mother's day! hee.. i think i very bad leh.. din give mi mum anithing.. wan to bring her out for dinner de.. but she din wan.. instead she go out with her friends for dinner.. =(


hm.. yesterday went out with cindy and xinyi to marina square.. hahaa.. den we go eat long john agn.. hee.. so nice.. so we go there walk walk only.. den after tt we went to the esplanade coz i nv go there before.. we frm the marina square there dunno how to walk back to city link.. haha... den we walked for so long and walked wrongly many times den found the correct way.. haha.. =X so we went through the mrt there to explanade and we walked through the wrong tunnel agn.. and saw jin xiao.. hahaa.. very diaox leh.. this is my first time i went to esplanade.. hm.. i think nthing much lah.. it is very big there.. ya.. went to the library there.. all abt arts thing de lorx.. no storybooks.. haha.. den we look at the movies.. hm.. saw many nice movies.. eg. gattaca and the shawshank redemption.. but din borrow.. so sad.. hm.. den we go hm at ard 6 bah..


at night watch xian jian.. the ending is so sad lah.. =( haiz.. all the gd ppl all die de lorx.. only left poor xiao yao.. so ke lian.. and ling er died.. haiz..


i really wasted my weekend.. spend most of my time watching da chang jin vcds at home.. haha.. oh well.. tml is monday le.. so fast.. it is going to be a horrible day.. many ppl will cry.. i think.. mi? ya.. i think i will too bah.. no.. i am going to be strong.. lets hope so.. not going to be like last wk.. yuppx.. good luck to everyone tml! =)

hahaa.. so many molecules are online now.. haha.. i suddenly miss asg too.. hope tt we can go out together soon..


*not looking forward to tml.. i am scared.. =( wad if i dun do well? i really worry for my results.. wad if.. haiz.. i dunno.. i will try to control myself tml de.. i hope so.. i din manage to do tt the last time.. but i will tml.. hopefully.. it was bad.. i dun like it to be this way.. ='( haiz..

am i really stress? i dunno.. i really dunno.. but they say so.. maybe it is really expectation problem.. maybe it really is.. i dunno.. sry ppl.. i am not trying to make u all stress during the exams period.. i will try to change too.. yuppx.. thanks a lot k..*

hey ppl! so sorry mi long time nv blog le.. well.. exams mah.. hahaa.. i should start blogging more often now k? hahaa..


hm.. i shall tok abt yesterday bah.. well.. how should i put it? yesterday was horrible? or was tt a gd thing? haha.. i also dunno leh..


we started off with sel and we watched a movie dunno call wad.. i think is shawshank somthing.. ya.. mr tan showed it to us.. it is a very nice movie.. hahaa.. he always show us very nice movies de.. lyk tt time green mile.. all very nice.. den next is ss and we continue to watch the movie we watched last time.. den i slept during the lesson.. hee.. nthing much later.. just tt we got back our amaths paper le.. it was horrible! dun mention it agn.. if not i will cry.. it is just expectation problem.. haiz..


hm.. so after sch, we waited for her to have a heart to heart talk.. during the waiting time, we went to the pt ground to play.. haha.. we climbed the wall n tok picture.. yeah! hahaa.. so ya.. after tt we talked.. it was quite awkward though.. but we cleared the things between us.. hahaa.. den many ppl cried.. it just happened.. lol.. yupx.. sry ppl for the sudden breakdown too.. haha.. shocked? thanks a lot for all the concern too! =) ASG ROCKS! hahaa.. tts wad friends are for.. =D den after tt we go 85 to eat.. haha.. den as usual tok tok tok.. den reach home quite late too.. hee..


shall tok abt yesterday too.. after exams, we went to east coast park to cycle! gt jieting, mi, jiesi, junle, huiling, yiyee, binli, socks, vanessa and jinxiao.. hahaa.. at first it started off with a little drizzle, but luckily it stop raining.. all of us took double bikes except junle and jinxiao.. hahaa.. it was so fun.. we rode the bike for 2 hours.. so tiring sia.. so sad tt we din bring camera n din take pictures.. =( den after tt we went to eat mac.. everyone was like dying of hunger n tirdness by tt time.. hahaa.. my hands n legs lyk want to break le.. den titus came.. hahaa.. he ran to the mac n was sweating lyk mad.. bin went home for piano and the rest of us went to parkway parade.. haha.. den we went to the arcade there.. coz we were wearing the yellow camp tee, den tt stupid person go chase us out.. he say we wear sch related tee so cannot go in.. lol.. we all very bu shuang when we got chase out.. hahaa.. coz we were playing so happily inside lorx.. erm.. ard 5 plus 6 lyk tt we wanted to go home le.. but we wanted to play swing suddenly.. so we went back to tanah merah there to play.. hahaa.. den cannot find the playground with the many swings de.. so we went to find the other.. hahaa.. although there is only 2 swings, but very fun.. hee.. we played until ard 7.30pm bah.. den decided to go home.. tts the way we are.. wan to go where den go where.. very carefree.. hahaa.. i like it this way.. =) along the way we go home, we talked a lot abt accidents and stuffs.. hahaa.. talk until so excited n scary.. hee.. den go home.. i reached home very early jiu slp liao.. so tiring lorx..


sorry for the brief account.. yuppx.. i will try to blog more de.. =)