we went to cha yuan today in the morning.. haha.. it was so nice.. i think tt that place is cosy.. esp when the 10 of us were lyk sitted in a room together and tok.. hahaa.. and we drank the tea and eat tea egg and zhong zi.. i think chinese tea is nice.. healthy too.. =) shld drink more often.. haha.. i hope time would have stood still den.. i dun wish to go back to sch.. how i wish we could have just sat there and drink tea and tok and tok.. i dun wan to face the fact.. i dun wan to come back sch to noe my sucky results.. i really dun.. owell.. but it is all over now.. our class noe all the results le.. we were in the com lab just now during emaths and den ms zarinah came in with our SS paper.. haiz.. my scipt was one of the last few.. i sat there waiting for my paper nervously.. i really thought i would fail.. really scared.. luckily i din.. but.. haiz.. most of the ppl in the class did well too.. oh.. i noe i shld not compare.. i dun have the qualities to do tt.. i dun have.. and i shld not.. but i just can't help it.. lol..


recently, many ppl are upset over their results.. well.. i am too.. i really very disappointed in some of my results.. i just wan to say thanks to everyone for consoling mi.. i wish i could help some of them too.. i see tt some of them are really upset n depressed over their results.. i really really wish i can cheer them up.. but i dunno how to.. i feel so helpless.. i dun wan them to be so upset too.. i hope they are happy.. they cried today.. i just wan to help them.. but i dunno how.. tell mi.. wad shld i do??? really feel upset seeing them lyk tt too.. esp when they seems ok and appear cheerful on the outside.. i am worried for them.. i scared tt they will breakdown too.. i dunno how they are feeling on the inside... i wan to help! pls.. let mi.. i just really hope tt they will be alright.. i noe tt they are facing a lot of family problems at home too.. but.. like the saying goes: jia jia you ben nan nian de jing.. haiz.. i wonder wad i can do for them.. hope tt this will be over soon.. and everyone can be back to normal and be happy agn.. lyk the times when we have fun together and crap and tok together.. but now.. we are all so quiet and tok abt nthing but results results and results.. but can't help it.. we have to.. tts the way abt students.. our burden is studying.. and family dun noe.. they think studying is easy.. haiz.. i dun noe how to encourage them.. seeing them lyk tt makes mi feel pain too.. i dunno why.. but this is the first time i am feeling so strongly.. the first time.. maybe they make mi feel gd when i am with them too.. they cared for mi.. they are concern for mi when i am down n lonely.. so i wan to care for them in the same way too.. haiz.. but i really dunno how.. i feel so useless tt i can't help anything..

i am bad too.. i also can't help it but seems very ap and sad smtimes.. forgive mi.. i will be stronger.. but i am greedy.. i still hope tt those ard mi will be happy and cheerful but not upset.. this will help mi feel better too..


stayed back after sch and slack and tok.. den have dinner.. but there were only 5 of us.. it is getting lesser and lesser.. y have it become lyk tt? i dun lyk it.. i dun lyk the quietness tt we have.. i preferred the noisy us who makes a lot of trouble for the uncles at 85.. when we tok and crap together.. we tok abt everything under the sun.. and can link from something to something.. hahaa.. never ending.. when can we return to these times? happy and memorable time.. i wish it would come quickly..


tml no sch.. going to have a very "nan guo" weekend agn.. haiz.. i dunno why since last week i have been missing asg a lot.. hoping tt chalet wld come quickly.. maybe becoz i am stuck at home where no one toks to mi or listen to wad i wan to say.. so i wan to go out.. alone and lonely.. lol.. nvm..



sry ppl.. i have been very ap these few days and weeks.. sry if i aped u.. really very sorry.. esp to a few ppl.. i may have seem pissed too.. but not at anyone but myself.. ya.. thx for all the concern.. =) i am alright de..



ppl are feeling sad n depressed.. so am i.. over results and family and stuffs.. i dunno wads wrong with mi.. cross the road carelessly twice today.. on purpose or not i dunno.. maybe i really did it on purpose.. well.. but i dun have the courage.. no worries den.. haha.. =)